Ever Thought About Self Love?

By self love I'm not talking about narcissism and lack of regard for others, but true, self love in terms of loving yourself for who you are. Do you? Despite all your weaknesses, perceived faults, parts of your body that you don't like... do you love yourself anyway?

If you can answer yes to that question - Fantastic! If you find it challenging to answer yes - don't beat yourself up over it! Many of us struggle to love ourselves - warts 'n' all. There is no blame here, just self awareness and self acceptance.

Let's look at this another way. There is an Ultimate Being, God, Buddha, Allah, Divine Spirit, Father Mother God, Creator, Holy Spirit, whatever your words for it, we know that there is an overall consciousness that inhabits everything. Is a part of everything. We can see this when we look at beautiful flowers, or landscapes, or stunning sunsets, the smell of fresh air, the taste of tasty food, the sounds of birdsong or rolling waves. Whatever you find relaxing or beautiful is infused with God consciousness. So when you look at, hear, feel, smell, taste, or touch these beautiful things it's easy to feel love for them.

Having accepted that God is in everything, we also then need to accept that God is within us. If we love God for being in everything, we also then need to love ourselves because of this. Otherwise we are rejecting God.

Now I know that these thoughts might be pushing some buttons in people because of the word "God". I make no apology for that. It's a terminology that is easy to use to get across the concept that the Ultimate Consciousness is within us all. Therefore Every Thing and Every One deserves to be loved by us - including ourselves.

Take some time to think more about yourself. Start to acknowledge more the things about yourself that you do actually like. Let go of negative thoughts about yourself that bring you down. You love other people warts and all, try doing the same for yourself. Take it gently, but take another step towards self love and self respect. Start by writing a list of 50 positive things that you love about yourself. It may take you a couple of days and that's OK. Take your time, but do make sure you complete it. Once you have your list can you make it longer? Every time you find something positive about yourself that you love or like, add it to the list and, each day.

Alun is a spirtual life coach focused on personal and spiritual evolution. You can read more about him and his work here http://www.lifesense.co.uk

Solutions to Anger

Some of us have difficulty recognizing our anger; some of us find it so troublesome to acknowledge our anger that we deny it and turn it inwards on ourselves. Hmmm. Sounds painful. It is! Anger turned inward is called depression. (I can hear some of you, maybe even health professionals, typing away at a rebuttal.) That's okay, do whatever you need to do to deal with your anger issues. It is much healthier to take some action, provided it does not harm anyone including yourself, than to turn your anger in. Writing is a very constructive outlet for anger. And don't tell me I am opposed to antidepressant medication. I am not, if it is used as part of the solution. If we take a pill, legal or not, and collude with the prescriber, (or collude with the patient if we are the prescriber), saying the pill is the solution, we do a great disservice. Medication can be an enormous help in bringing one up to a level of functioning to effectively deal with the anger, fear and depression. Still, one does have to deal with the anger, fear and depression. Sorry, there is no magic pill and my magic wands have been on backorder for years now.

And, if you believe you have a "chemical imbalance" causing your depression, start balancing it with resolving your old anger. There is no harm in trying...it just might work. It's a chicken and egg deal...think about it.

So how does that anger stuff work? In an earlier article, we talked about children, (you?) who are brought up without being taught a constructive way to deal with normal anger. Watch a toddler get frustrated (angry) with trying something new, which they do about every two and a half minutes. If they are helped through both the something new and the frustration by another person, their anger (frustration) gets resolved. What's going on here? The toddler is angry because he cannot do or get something; he is fearful he will not be able to do or get something he wants. Take away his toy. What happens? He is angry because he has lost something. If he is helped to do or get what it is he wants, his anger goes away; if he cannot have whatever it is, but is coached through his feelings, receives empathy and hugs, and has his needs met, he moves on, not needing to hang onto the anger...someone has understood and helped him feel better in spite of not getting what he wants.

As adults, we have the same emotions: we get angry because we are afraid of losing something we have, or not being able to get or do something we want. For those with a history of being abused, this is very serious; you may have lost all trust in other people, all sense of self, have no self-esteem and be angry with God, if you believe there is a God. You, too, can heal. It just takes a lot of hard work.

If we agree that anger is an expression of fear, then part of the solution is to allow oneself to identify and feel it. Becoming vulnerable enough to experience the fear then allows us to look for a solution. Here's where it gets sticky. What is the fear about? Example: if it is real time and there is real danger, protect yourself. If you are angry and afraid of being thrown out of your apartment because you owe back rent, get a job. Get two jobs, sober up, stop spending money on entertainment and pay the rent. Then you don't have to be fearful and angry at losing your place.

People who are willing to look carefully at underlying fear usually find that they need to trust. Trust the process, trust the universe, maybe even trust that there is a God who is in charge and can help. Example: big business deal depending on decision by other party...you cannot control other party, are fearful of losing deal so are generally pissy with everyone, family and friends as well as your office manager. Not cool. If you have done everything you can, acknowledge your fear, then trust. Try praying, not for everything to go your way, but for acceptance; it can't hurt.

If your anger (fear) is based in old stuff, perhaps childhood neglect or abuse, abandonment or frequent frustration, the solution to your current feelings will require some sorting out. Most of this stuff is too much for anyone to do alone...your brain is not always your friend. Therapy can help, as can support groups, but you have to really use them; writing or journaling about old stuff is therapeutic. Physical activity to discharge some of the anxiety and irritability is the best medicine I know and changes brain chemistry to actually produce internal antidepressants called endorphins.

For those of you in a recovery program, you have access to tools, called steps, to deal with old stuff. Write your fourth step! For those who are not in recovery, similar "steps" provide the solution; they include reading, writing, talking with others, especially those who have been there, listening, and praying.

Get to work. It is not useful to carry around old fear and anger to make you depressed and no fun for your family and friends!

Dr. Dawn Obrecht is the only MD addiction medicine specialist on the western slope of Colorado. She is a Fellow of the American Society of Addiction Medicine and her office is in Steamboat Springs. She does consultations and referrals anywhere in the country and can be reached at 970-846-8479 or through http://www.docdawn.com

The Power of Gratitude - Gateway to Riches

Gratitude is said to be the single most positive element to contribute to your Wellbeing, Fulfillment and Wealth

Heartmath conducted an extensive study which showed thoughts of Gratitude are the fastest way to move into your power and influence things around you with positive energy - Athlete's Performance increases, Students Test Scores improve, Executive Thinking and Creativity expand, Powers of Intention grow, no matter what he situation.

Gratitude restores confidence. Gratitude about your current situation - no matter what or how simple, will bring about a feeling of improved wellbeing. Gratitude can help to change feeling alone into appreciating being supported.

The feeling of lack and negativity are often brought on by focusing on what we don't or feel we cannot have. Expand your focus, raise your eyes, look outside your immediate surroundings. Walk around and look to see, or think, of the many things you have access to, which you have no need to own - community, sunshine, the stars, the sight or sound of children playing, a casual hello from someone you meet.

We can even be grateful for things that at first glance may not appear a blessing, such as: * Exercise you get if you cannot find a nearby parking spot
- Cleaning up the house after having friends or family around - think of the special time or what they mean to you
- The early morning alarm - moving into a new day of being needed
- Whatever your income - 2.4 billion people on the planet live on less than $1,000 per year

A large study conducted by Dr Michael McCullough and Dr Robert Edmonds involving more than 700 people separated their field of study into 3 groups of people - those that merely tracked events through their day, those that took particular note of unpleasant events that occurred to them, and lastly a group which focused on being grateful for whatever happened. The third group consistently showed High Alertness, Enthusiasm, Determination, Optimism, Better Energy, Less Depression and Stress, Better Inclination to Help Others, and Ability to Express Love to Others.

You must feel rich to become rich - when you start to feel grateful for whatever you have you will attract more. In today's world Intelligent Quotient (IQ) and Emotional Quotient (EQ) are often thought as important but these both pale when compared with the direct benefits of GQ - Gratification Quotient.

The Power of Attraction which we hear about so much today as so well described in "The Secret" is supercharged through Gratitude.

Gratitude is the fastest path to Riches. Focus on what you have and more will appear. Others will be drawn to your energetic field of gratitude. Riches are more about what you feel than just counting in money. Another Heartmath study showed when we are in a state of gratitude others can sense this up to 6 metres away. This has a direct positive affect on their heart rhythm and their brain waves change to more positive thinking.

Pay attention to what you are focusing on, don't blame or complain this will drain your gratitude. Be grateful for your challenges, create a greater peace of mind and you will open the pathways for opportunities.

Watch out for negative attitudes creeping into your life. Apathy leads to negative thinking. Look for the silver linings in all situations. Slow down, recognise what you already have - especially the simple things in your life, wherever you go. Gratitude will help you feel complete, no matter what your immediate situation.

Gratitude doesn't cost anything but it generates huge riches.

You deserve to be Rich so be grateful and share your gratitude with others. A daily practice of Gratitude will lift and advance all areas of your life rapidly.

Brian Fincham
- Life Coach and founder of Life Development Australia.
Brian has over 20 years Experience Developing and Leading Winning Teams
http://www.lifepathdevelopment.com.au
- a company dedicated to Personal Development and helping individuals build successful home businesses using the proven LifePath Unlimited system.

10 Significant Tips For Positive Thinking

Maintaining a healthy lifestyle by positive thinking will help you to neutralize negative thoughts, develop positive affirmations, build self-image and confidence in yourself and achieve success in life. There are situations sometimes which may find that your career is not going in the proper direction and your income is not according to your expectations.

This situation is worse, if you find that your career even after trying many is not generating desired results. In such hard times habit of positive thinking can help you to fill your mind with good and productive thoughts which will give you peace of mind. Then why not to use God's precious gift to create true happiness in life?

You must have observed that when you wish to do something creative in your life, and if you think that 'I can't do this', it is sure that you will not! But when you say that ' I can do this', automatically, your job becomes easy and also gets over soon. This is called positive attitude. 'I Can do this' is the secret.

Most of us talk to ourselves and 90% of it is negative. We do this in our bad times just due to fear or frustration. It is possible to overcome such situations by way of positive thinking.

There are 10 ways to do positive thinking:

1. Discover the amazing power of Positive thinking.
2. Develop the habit of thinking positive only.
3. Find out why particular thing is not working.
4. Never lose confidence.
5. Efforts and hard work changes worst situations.. Think it will work for you too.
6. Maintain friendly relations with others.
7. Request someone to help you in times of crisis.
8. Find ways to change adverse situations. Never give up.
9. Practice techniques of 'Meditation' to get control over your body and soul.
10. Think that your best time is yet to come and it will.

Occupy your mind with pleasant, and productive thoughts. Just concentrate on the positive thoughts. This way negative thoughts will automatically begin to drop or you will never mind them. Remember those people are successful who work with spirit and excitement. If you check with history, you will find that positive thinking has produced wonders in life and have given a major contribution towards human progress.

Pankaj Mistry is a freelance professional copywriter and content developer. He has won couple of awards for his concepts and themes for various topics. You can contact him at: artystry@hotmail.com

Why Smart Goals Don't Work

Each year, I receive at least half a dozen identical articles touting the benefits of SMART goals: Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic, and Time-bound. SMART goals are increasingly seen as the secret to personal and business success. Unfortunately, it's a pretty safe bet that most of these goals will go the way of the proverbial New Year's resolution. Why? Because none of these articles actually tell you how to make SMART goals work. In fact, most people who try the SMART approach for any but small and relatively easy goals frequently find themselves frustrated and disillusioned.

Well-constructed goals are extremely powerful tools for getting things done, increasing concentration and motivation. Successfully completing a well-constructed goal builds self-confidence. Unfortunately, creating a well-constructed SMART goal is not quite so simple as the average article makes it out to be.

To begin with, a specific goal is only useful if it's something you can control. Although this may seem obvious, the fact is that far too many people set goals that appear to be under their control, but really are not. For example, consider the athlete who sets the goal of winning an upcoming tournament: it's specific, it's measurable, it has a time of completion associated with it. Is it achievable and realistic? Depending on the athlete's level of skill, very possibly. However, the athlete has no control over the difficulty of the competition. He may simply be outplayed by a more skilled opponent.

Furthermore, although the goal is measurable, in that the athlete will know whether or not he accomplishes it, the measurement is not particularly useful. At no time will he know how close he is to accomplishing the goal, where he needs to focus his energies, or what else needs to be accomplished. The athlete is far better served by setting the goal of exercising certain key skills in the competition, skills that have a high probability of leading to a victory. Not only will he gain the self-confidence boost of accomplishing his goal, he may just win the tournament.

Another problem is that a goal is simply too big. If a goal takes years to accomplish, it can be extremely difficult to maintain motivation. Big, ambitious goals are wonderful, but they need to be carefully structured. It is vital to break them down into subgoals that can be accomplished in a much shorter period of time. The perception of progress is critical to maintaining motivation, whether for an individual or a team.

Having too many goals is another common problem. Well constructed goals are great, but if you have too many of them at once, they become a distraction. Many people can focus on three to five unrelated goals without a problem, but not ten or twenty. Keeping in mind that each goal might generate numerous subgoals along the way, it's easy to see how having more than a few key goals can easily balloon out of control.

Is the goal something you really care about? Many people have goals that they don't really care about. Perhaps they've been told it's something they ought to do or they believe they should do, but they don't really care about the outcome. If you don't care whether or not you accomplish a goal, it's hard to find the motivation to do it.

Used properly, SMART goals can be a very powerful and effective tool. Well-constructed goals can increase motivation, improve focus, and build self-confidence. Used improperly, they can decrease motivation, and destroy self-confidence. If you're using SMART goals, here are some questions to ask yourself:

Do I control the outcome?

Can I measure progress in a meaningful way?

Is my goal too big? Can I break it up?

Do I have too many goals? Is there enough time in the day/week/month to work on each one?

Do I really care about my goal? Is this something I genuinely want to accomplish?

Good luck!

Stephen Balzac is the president of 7 Steps Ahead (http://www.7stepsahead.com), a consulting firm based in Stow, MA. He can be contacted at 978-298-5189 or steve@7stepsahead.com

The Trap of the Common Sense

Many people are not satisfied with their lives and want to achieve more. However, only few actually make their dreams come true. Why does this happen?

It seems to be logical that if you are not satisfied with life you are negative about your current situation; you have negative thoughts and constantly complain. For many people it is also logical to blame others for things that didn't work out in their lives. This kind of logic actually keeps people where they are today.

Many things that seem to be a "common sense" and "intuitive" in reality just ways everybody does things. It is our collective thinking that makes them common sense and intuitive. If you look at lives that people live you will see how these "common sense" habits, perceptions and beliefs make their lives miserable. They keep people at their current jobs, stiff all their creativity, promote fear of taking risks, keep them glued to their comfort zones. This results in deep inner dissatisfaction and is a direct way to depressions and different self-destroying addictions.

"Think outside the box" is not just a common self-improvement textbook phrase. It has a deep meaning of questioning all the "common sense" things in order to see the way out which is usually just in front of you. You can't see it because it is not part of your belief system, it doesn't go along with how you perceive the world.

Let's go back to a "negative" situation you find yourself in. The non-intuitive and only way out of it is to be positive. Do you want to have good things in life? Be positive about what you already have, be deeply grateful for every single thing, no matter how little, that you have in your life right now. Do you want to have more control over your life? Never blame anybody for anything that happened to YOU. Take full responsibility for attracting people and events into your life. How you can attract anything good if you are always negative?

It seems to be hard to be positive and grateful when everything is wrong however it is just a matter of forcing yourself to repeat positive phrases in your head even if you don't agree with them or they don't sound to be true. With time you will start actually feeling the truth in your statements.

As your perception of the world changes, slowly the physical world around you will change to reflect better who you are.

Do you need help to make your dreams come true? Visit http://www.pathstopower.net for a free book and more details.

Are you interested in natural health, weight loss, energy secrets? Visit http://www.nutrifitpower.com/ezine.html for free reports and more details.

Lynn Alex is a Life-Skills Coach, Yoga Teacher and an American Board Certified Holistic Health Practitioner.

A One Minute Meditation

Maybe learning to meditate intimidates you, and in any case it's tough to find the time for daily meditation. The solution to both problems is an easy meditation you can learn right now, that will only take a minute to do each day.

An Easy Meditation Technique

Breathing through your mouth expands your chest, but if you breath through your nose you'll notice how your abdomen extends. You see, nose-breathing causes the diaphram to pull air to the bottom of your lungs. This delivers a good dose of oxygen into your bloodstream and brain. It also tends to relax you.

Breathing through your nose is healthier, and it's the basis of this one-minute meditation. You simply close your eyes, let the tension go out of your muscles, let go of your thoughts (to the extent possible), and take four slow, deep breaths through your nose, paying attention to your breathing.

Is Meditation This Easy?

You're not likey to get you into a deep meditative state with this simple exercise. You will get benefits, though. These will almost certainly include a clearer mind and a reduction in stress.

Try to develop a "trigger" for your meditation. You can do your four breaths when you get into the car, for example, or right after lunch each day. A trigger is a place or time that reminds you, so your meditation becomes a habit.

Some may say this isn't "real" meditation, but there's nothing wrong with enjoying the relaxation you'll get from this technique. You can always pursue deeper meditation later, if you wish. In the meantime, remember that not everything has to be difficult to be of value. Why not do an easy one-minute meditation right now?

Steve Gillman writes on many self help topics including boosting brainpower, losing weight, meditation, habits of mind, creative problem solving, learning gratitude, generating luck and anything related to self improvement. You'll find more at http://www.SelfImprovementNow.com